Simply Random Craziness
by Mr. BramStoker
Summary: Jean and the X-Gang prove that insanity is indeed contagious as they cause havoc in a tribute to a classic animated film from the 90s


**Simply Random Craziness**

"What the heck are you lunatics DOING?! You're tearing up my garden!" Wanda shrieked as Scott, Jean, Remy, Sam, Logan, Lorna and Betsy were digging large holes in the petunias and tomatoes garden. Wanda couldn't help but wonder exactly **why** the x-guys were wearing outfits from the 17th century.

"Ah Wanda! You're just in time! We're digging for treasure! There's nothing around here but gold! Mountains of it!" Jean babbled, a crazed gleam in her eye. "The only thing **I** see around here is you people acting like a bunch of idiots! Get out of my garden!" Wanda hissed before Scott smacked her with the shovel.

"Thank you. Now where was I?" Jean asked to herself as Betsy got out her violin. A mischievous smile formed on Jean's face as she stood dramatically atop a mound of dirt. Wanda groaned as she knew what was coming.

"_the Gold of Cortez, the Jewels of Pizarro, will seem like mere trinkets by this time tomorrow!_" Jean sang operatically revealing holographic gems, everyone gazing wildly at the sight.

"Yeah right. Jean, do you even **realize** you've gone overboard? There is NO GOLD!" Wanda hollered, but to no avail. "_The gold we find here, will dwarven our fort, all that you've got in ya boys, dig up Bayville, boys!_" Jean belted, tossing out a large amount of shovels, pickaxes and jackhammers.

"I give up. I'm out of this madhouse." Wanda snarled, about to exit before Jean grabbed her by the shoulder with a shovel and brought her forward

"_It's Mine boys! Mine every mountain! And dig boys! Dig til you drop! Grab a pick boys! Quick, boys! Shove in that shovel, and look at those lovely pebbles that sparkle and shine!_" Jean chorused, tossing a handful of pebbles and gold sparks, the others amazed by its splendor.

"Hey, I saw the shovels out and… what in the?" Rogue paused, choking on that last sentence as she saw Jean and the others dancing with digging tools over a now excavated garden

"_It's gold! And it's mine… mine… MINE!" _Jean ranted, firing a pistol as the X-Crew started digging, chanting "and dig, and dig, and diggety-dig, and dig and dig, and diggety-dig"

"_Hey nonny nonny hey nonny nonny" _Scott chanted, pouring in a bagful of silver in a wheelbarrow. "Ooh how I love it!" Jean grinned

"_Hey nonny nonny, hey nonny nonny" _Remy chanted, sawing a large pine tree, causing it to crash on top of Jean-Paul. "Riches for **cheap!**" Warren piped up, popping out of the tree limbs

"Hey nonny nonny, there'll be heaps of it!" Scott exclaimed as Jean stood on the barrel. "_And I'll be on top of the heap!_" Jean chorused, before all of a sudden, the yard transformed into an illusion of Buckingham Palace.

"_My rivals at home know that I'm bitter, think how they squirm when they see I glitter. The ladies of court will be on Twitter." _Jean chorused, kissing English maidens… and Pietro in a dress wearing makeup. "Disgusting!" Pietro growled

"_the King will award me, he'll knight me. No, adore me!" _Jean preferred, standing on the throne as Xavier and everyone bowed before reality sank as Jean sliced a tree down with her machete "_It's mine, mine, mine for the taking! It's mine, boys, MINE ME THAT GOLD!" _Jean screamed, shaking Roberto wildly over a gold pan

"_glory and frilly, my dear Colonel Fury will probably build me a shrine_" Jean boasted as Scott placed a makeshift portrait of Fury's head in front of Jean as she burst through the photo "_when all of the gold… is MINE!" _both chorused

"and dig, and dig, and diggety-dig, and dig and dig, and diggety-dig…" the X-Gang hummed as Warren soared over the woodlands "_All of my life I've dreamed for a power like this one! A newer, more agile, cunning ever designed!" _Warren chorused, swinging onto a vine. "_Thousands of new things await, and I don't plan to miss one! In a form I can tame, a power I can claim, the greatest evolution is MINE!_" Warren echoed over a waterfall, echoing as Jean stood over the mutants pick-axeing the ground "_Keep on working lads, keep on digging lads, it's mine, boys! Mine me all that… GOLD! Beautiful Gold!" _Jean sang, soaring through a vast wave of riches and diamonds, Wanda shaking her head in disgust.

"This is just ridiculous. Just look at them; they've officially gone nuts." Wanda snorted, Rogue simply grinning wildly before adding "_I'd help you to dig, lass, but I've got this crick in me spine"_ grabbing Wanda by the neck

"_This land we behold!" _Warren cheered

"_This beauty uphold!" _Jean echoed

"_A man can be bold!" _Warren chimed over the skies

"_It all can be sold!" _Jean chanted, lighting a cannon before ducking as cannonballs bombed the grounds, the X-Guys scurrying away from the chaos.

**All: **_So dug up the gold (riches for cheap)_

_From these earth riches (on these britches)_

_On this shoreland (dig up the gold)_

_Mine (and dig, and dig, and diggety-dig)_

_Jean: Hey nonny nonny, its MINE!_

**I do not own X-Men or the song "Mine, Mine, Mine" from Pocahontas.**


End file.
